Music of the Day, 14 September 2023

a feeling deep inside of me tells me this can't be the place

One of the highlights of the European tour I took as a band member was seeing so much history and culture. Since childhood I’ve been fascinated by Gothic architecture: its ogival arches, flying buttresses, tracery, and stained glass windows are graceful beauty; the gargoyles and grotesques¹ are fanciful additions that add a touch of dark ornamentation. Getting to explore both the interior and exterior of Notre-Dame and the Strasbourg Cathedral on my own time were highlights of the trip.²

It may seem paradoxical, but the buildings’ religious aspects held no interest or significance for me. I’d been an atheist since childhood, thanks to the fundamentalist Baptist church my siblings and I were forced to attend with our grandparents. The culmination of so much talent and skill from so many disparate professions into a beautiful building awed and inspired me … and still does.

I never heard Crosby, Stills, & Nash’s (CSN) song “Cathedral” on the radio; it’s from their 1977 album, CSN. “Just a Song Before I Go” was all over the radio back then, but “Cathedral” was too heretical for the conservative Midwestern region I grew up in. But I grew up adoring CSN’s luscious harmonies and music, as well as when Neil Young (CSNY) joined them.

Years later, a friend shared a folder of CSN tracks labeled “anthology,” which appears to be their own collection of the tracks that comprise 1991’s CSN Box Set.³ I was happily listening along until I got to “Cathedral,” which stopped me in my tracks. My first thought was, “He [Nash] must have been high, because non-clergy aren’t allowed on the altar most of the time!” Turns out I was kind of right—he was tripping on LSD as he toured Winchester Cathedral.

The dynamics of the song—tempo and volume—splendidly compliment the building and subsiding passion of the lyrics. It sounds like some orchestral strings come in during the first chorus, which is a very nice touch too. Beautiful as the music is, the lyrics are what arrested my attention. To that point, I’d never heard a song that captured my thoughts about religion so well. I felt seen and validated in way I never had before from a song.

Listening to it this morning for the first time in over 15 years, it’s still deeply moving. The only thing that might make it better is the addition of Young’s lovely voice.⁴ Alas, after David Crosby’s death early this year, we’ll never know.

1. Gargoyles are carved or formed figures that serve as a spout to divert rainwater away from the sides and foundation of a building; grotesques are the same, except that they are purely ornamental—they do not carry water.

2. Lucking out and catching an organ recital at Notre-Dame made the visit even more memorable

3. No, I didn’t ask about its provenance

4. Did you think I was going to say some organ music?